Being Led

Last night I continued to ponder 

what to talk to the children about 

in worship this morning.   

I have been doing that 

pondering all week 

with no ideas coming. 

As I prepared for rest, 

I wondered if prayer might 

be a good subject.     

These young boys and I 

pray to Jesus.  I have come 

to love those tender moments 

and it is true that children 

can lead us just like Jesus said. 

  

Later I dream of my father, 

who passed many years ago.

He is intently stitching

a place in my mouth, 

like tending to a wound.  

For some reason

I am between the seats of 

a car, and I find myself 

slipping more and more 

into a space that feels

much too small.   

I fear I am stuck. 

I finally cry out, 

"Daddy!  Help me!"    

He extends a hand 

and easily lifts me.  

I think of the phrase, 

"sets me right."    

   

This morning I think 

such a fervent cry is seldom 

the tone of my prayers, 

but many have cried 

out to Jesus 

in full panic 

and the hand has always been there 

to set them right.   

   

Maybe we will talk about prayer 

and pray this morning.   

I know that is always ok with Jesus.      

    

Images of children at the border surface.  May our nation hear and be lead into a new time of responding to the cries of children who are hungry, lost, and afraid. Jesus, we are failing to be stirred by their plight.  This morning I weep. Perhaps my wailing should be louder?  

Learning Places

"Some old men came to see Abbba Poemen, and said to him, "Tell us, when we see brothers dozing during the sacred office, should we pinch them so they will stay awake?" The old man said to them, "Actually, if I saw a brother sleeping, I would put his head on my knees and let him rest."   

 

In God's Holy Light Sister Joan Chittister, OSB     

   

It is not uncommon to see this in memory care homes.  People sit together and nap; yes, even in the midst of a worship service.  While the dozing ones may not put their heads in their neighbors' knees, shoulders seem to work quite well as a resting place.  

  

I am part of a couple of online women clergy groups. While I seldom take part in the conversations, one recent question caught my attention.  The minister was inquiring how to become a better preacher without taking a class.  There were many suggestions for books to read, podcasts, etc.  However, my encouragement was to regularly lead worship in a few  skilled nursing and/or memory care communities.  You will strengthen your voice.  You will learn to try to mold your homily to those present in the room. You will learn to keep things short, succinct, and lively.  And, in the case when your brothers and sisters are napping on one another's shoulders, you will learn that Jesus is there, quite awake, and listening to every word you say. 

        

  

Conversion

In the dream,  

and maybe in waking life, 

he covers my eyes 

and asks me to walk 

forward in faith.  

I do so,  

sensing the ocean 

is near. 

Finally I remove his hands

and say, 

"Not for lack of faith, 

but because I want 

to see."  

We were on craggy bluff 

high above restless waves - 

not a smooth place in sight.  

I wonder how this can be 

walked at all.  

  

Last night 

the dream 
was of  a large still lake

surrounded by trees.  

It is almost completely dark
 but there is enough light 

to take in the beauty. 

Until he speaks, 

there are no sounds, 

not even the rustling of leaves 

or the lapping of water at the shore.  

All I hear is, 

"You should be with me."  

    

I am still slowly making my way through Julian's Gospel by Veronica Mary Rolf.  I have just completed the section where Julian is on her deathbed and she is experiencing graphic revelations about Christ's crucifixion.  A difficult read, but as painful as these revelations are, and as close to death as Jesus comes, he does not die, but rather continues to not only accept his suffering, he does so in joy.  She does not take her eyes off of him for a moment, even when tempted to do so, and addresses the eternal living Christ as "my heaven (352). "  In that moment, she accepts staying with Jesus in her lifetime, in both "wele and woe," in the joys and the sorrows, and knows only bliss.  Despite her coming so close to dying, it was not yet time for her to die. There was more to be revealed to and through her.     

  

This is no doubt true for you and me as well.  There is more to be revealed.     

Finding the Starting Point

"Don't start by trying to love God, or even people; love rocks and elements first, move to trees, then animals, and then humans. Angels will soon seem like a real possibility, and God is then just a short leap away." 

Father Richard Rohr, The Universal Christ (p.57)
photograph: San Leandro, June 2019

Might be good to carry a small stone in our pockets - for those times when we find we need to get back to the basics. This idea  also helps me understand mandalas a little more. May we all find someone or something to love today.  Start small if you need to.  We will be led ever on.   

    

    

Morning Questions

I dreamed of a fish 

covered with expertly 

placed glinty scales. 

With bright eyes wide open 

it moved silently through  

the glittery waters.

Light was everywhere. 

  

I woke thinking of 

 Apostle Paul's 

knowing  we are  

clothed in Christ. 

Can I really move so freely, 

donned in such light, 

breathing in and breathing out, 

going only where the river 

takes me , 

trusting in that great flow?    

 

Really, where and how else 

could I possibly go?     

   

say,  June 2019   

  

"... for in Christ Jesus you are all children of God through faith. As many of you as were baptized into Christ have clothed yourselves with Christ."   

Galatians 3:26-27