In Passing

By the time I reached the first home today, I had learned of a beloved elder's passing.  When I first began serving this home, there was a small, but very loyal group who would join me for worship.  Velma was the last of this group to pass, and the home is now dedicated to the care of those with dementia.  They are doing a fine job, but it is different.  I could not help but think of those who had gone before: Thelma, Roger, Betty, and others.  I could see their faces and I missed them.  They really helped shape how I go about this wondrous ministry and I am grateful to have known them. 

 

When I got to the third home, I was really happy to see Rae sitting at her spot at the table.  She is frailer now and is in a wheelchair, but she is always glad to see us, and she still sings.  After the service, the pianist continued to play, and Rae and I talked.  I have known her for 3 1/2 years as well.   

 

Today she said, "After church sometime, you should come over to my house and relax. Just put your feet up. "  I replied that I would like that very much.  She then told me that she always talks to God and that she believes that He listens.   "I can see him in my mind,"  she said.  I asked if she would share with me what God looked like.  She grinned and said, "Oh, He is a doll.  He is always laughing, and He wears beautiful robes.  I tell him I am sorry for all the bad things I have done, and He reminds me to keep smiling."  

 

The room was a bit warm and it was such a lovely day on the peninsula.  I asked Rae if she would like to go outside.  She said she thought that would be a good idea, so I unlocked her wheelchair and slowly pulled her chair away from the table and out the door.  We stopped to look at the large roses and the beautiful large tree.  This garden is very safe for those with dementia, and we slowly strolled and rolled.  As we went around one corner, Rae said, "I don't think we can make it all the way to where I live."  

 

"Where do you live, Rae?"  "Tucson, "  she replied.  "No, I don't think we can go quite that far.  Shall we go through this door?"   I took her back to her spot at the table and locked her wheels.   "How about that, Rae? Door to door service!"  She laughed and told me I was kind of silly.   She then said, "I love you."  We hugged.  "I love you, too. I will see you in July.  I like the way they have done your hair today."  

 

I have often walked in that garden with an elder.  The pace is slow.  Sometimes we walk in silence.  Sometimes we have a conversation.  I may be pushing the wheelchair, or holding a hand, but regardless I am always following.  I want them to always feel safe in the garden, and with me.  I am renewed in that small garden.   

 

Perhaps God is as well.